Wednesday, August 5, 2009

The Little Tortilla Strip That Could......

My experiences with Cafe Rio have been generally pleasant. The first time I ate there, I got unbelievably ill, which in turn made me not want to eat there because I was always reminded of that burrito and its awful taste it had on its way out my mouth and into the toilet. I was constantly bombarded with people asking, "Its so good, how can you not like Cafe Rio?" Well because the last time I ate there I spent 3 days in the bathroom. So after a year or so, I gave in and gave it another try, and I loved it! Thus began my love affair with Cafe Rio, we had a rough beginning, but dont all great relationships begin that way?.......I dont know. So needless to say, it became a favorite.
Now last Monday, I was heavily craving some Cafe Rio, since I hadn't eaten there in awhile. When it was time for my lunch break at work, I called my order in and set off with anticipation for my much awaited mouth watering tostada. I arrived during the lunch rush of death and destruction, but when is any Cafe Rio not on the brink of mass chaos. Luckily, I called in my order To-Go, so I would not have to wait through the Disneyland-long line that was almost spilling out the door. Score 1 for Hannah. So I smuggly walked to the To-Go line. At that time I noticed four lovely looking Orem City Firefighters sitting, enjoying their meal in all their hotness.....So as an off-handed thought, as naturally does when I see a policeman or firefighter, I thought, "Well, I guess if someone chokes or has a heart attack, at least the firemen are here....." I know I am weird, but that is how my brain works. Then remembered my craving and focused on the task at hand; getting my food. While I looked for a table to sit and eat, the only one that was open and clean was a small square table next to the wall, just across from the firemen.......Sweet, lunch AND a show...... :)
Not much happened after that, I sat down, ate, casually glanced at the gorgeous firemen, ya know, normal stuff. As I got to the end of my meal, the firemen were more than finished and were just sitting and chatting; I took a bite chewed a bit, swallowed and BAM! One of those crunchy little tortilla strips was slicing my throat sideways and I started to panic. Initially I froze and thought, "You did this to yourself, you idiot, for thinking about choking!!" and then the next thought was, "I cant breathe!!!" Which I could, but I was panicking. This all took like half a second, but felt like forever, so my next goal was to get that stupid thing out of there and I remembered I could breathe, but I couldnt swallow because the tortilla strip was stabbing my esophagus! Next comes the REALLY embarrassing part....So I realized I could breathe, but my throat was so irritated and naturally the body's response is to cough to get something out of there, so I launched into a full on coughing fit! But to make matters worse I leaned over and turned toward the wall so as to hopefully minimize my visibility. Looking at it from another view, I would have guessed I was puking......through the ringing in my ears, I heard the sound of multiple chairs being suddenly pushed back and scraping the ground, and next thing I know there was a hand on my back, I turned up to see Mr. Fireman's concerned, but professional face, "Are you okay?" All I could do was nod, but I noticed that the three other firemen were standing around my table overlooking the chubby girl who cant chew her food. As I turned my face back down to ride out the coughing fit, in the breaks between the firemens bodies, I noticed a few, maybe 50 on-lookers all wondering what I was doing to attract the attention of all 4 firemen, and I can assure you, I did not flash them! :) Inappropriate? Eh, oh well!
So finally, I was able to stop coughing long enough to turn and thank the firemen with a shaky voice and reassure them that I really was okay, just mostly embarrassed, which they politely smiled and went back to their table.....
Time elapsed? like 1-2 minutes
Level of Embarrassement on a scale from 1- 10? 45
At this point, people were still staring so I threw all my meal stuff into the bag, got up, threw it in the trash can and walked out with my drink and no dignity. I didnt even get to eat my cinnamon mint.....
So thank you Orem City Fire Department, for responding to the damsel in distress and asking if I was okay. I would have much rather preferred you ask for my number. I'm just sayin. :)